Quick Hitts

How many mouth-breathing brain-dead adults can you find in this picture? A fourteen year old boy in Lewisville Texas applied some hand sanitizer that was on his fifth grade teachers desk.  He smelled it, but evidently inhaled too deeply. The school officials called the cops, who hauled him into the police department, photographed and fingerprinted […]

Some German smokers are showing how upset they are with the new smoking ban by sporting a black t-shirt decorated with a yellow Star of David, with “Smoker” written across the star.  This has upset just about every Jewish group in existence. The smokers are in the right church, but most definitely in the wrong […]

Nope. Not any more. Sweden’s Army (yes, they have one) had an insignia featuring a lion, viewed from the side.  He was obviously a boy lion.   Evidently some of the women didn’t like that, so they demanded he be neutered. (Ain’t that just like a woman.) He was. Christian Braustein, of the army’s Tradition Commission, […]

When my kids were little I watched Sesame Street with them, and some of the jokes were obivously aimed at adults. I remember Cookie Monster, sitting in a big leather chair in a library, smoking a pipe and announcing, “This Is Alastair Cookie, bringing you Monster Piece Theater.” My kids didn’t know why I was […]

When Michael Graham took his daughter to the pediatrician for a routine checkup, he wasn’t expecting that she’d be grilled about his drinking. He didn’t expect the doctor would ask his kid if he and his wife got along well, or if either of them used drugs, or of he made his daughter “feel uncomfortable”, […]

In a semi-free country like the US it’s difficult to impose tyranny in one fell swoop. It has to be done slowly, little by little, baby step by baby step. And it’s important that those first few steps seem reasonable. The first anti-smoker law was passed in the sixties. It demanded smoking and non-smoking sections […]

The Mayor of Cincinnati won’t fire off a starter pistol to signal the beginning of an upcoming road race, because he doesn’t like the symbolism. “I think the symbolism is just bad,” he said. “It’s just something I don’t do.” The mayor says he’s going to blow a whistle instead. Last year the city had […]