You’ve probably seen those commercials where people with vastly different politics are sitting on a couch in front of the ocean preaching about Global Warming. (Pronounced so you can hear the capital letters.) The creepiest/most disgusting of them is the one that pairs Al Sharpton with Pat Robertson.

Let’s break this down. Al Sharpton came to prominence with the Tawana Brawley case. Tawana had been partying for four days and tried to cover her tracks by smearing feces on herself and crawling into a garbage bag. (Old Joke: Did you hear about the new Tawana Brawley burger? It comes in a plastic bag and you put your own shit on it.) Sharpton showed up and proceeded to fling his own poo all over the place, starting what was to be a life long career of race bating. This wasn’t too far from my neck of the woods, and the racial tensions Al created were palpable. After a grand jury proved that Tawana was literally a lying sack of shit, she fled the state with $300,000 that had been contributed by her supporters. She then converted to Islam and changed her name to Maryam Muhammad.

Al was sued by the cops he smeared, lost the lawsuit, and has never paid a dime of the judgment against him. A master showman, he continues to contribute to the deterioration of race relations in the US.

Pat Robertson is one of the best known evangelical Christians in the US. He lied about his military service, claiming to have seen combat. The men who served with him say he never saw combat, and his primary job was to bring them beer. In 1976 he proclaimed that the apocalypse would come in October of 1982. The most significant thing that happened that month was the introduction of Double Stuff Oreos, which are delicious.

So I’m supposed to believe in Global Warming based on the proclamations of these two holy dirtbags? And since Robertson has claimed, many times, to be able to control the weather with his prayers, why should we be concerned? He can solve the crisis simply by spending a few minutes on his knees.